Calm

. . . It is a ritual for me Something I do to ease my mind Tame the beast Silence the screams The one constant Never changing Always helpful The calming static

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Pretend

. . . My mind is a haze I can’t even keep up to my thoughts I exist in this shell of who I once was Who I would give anything to be again I search for remnants of her Clues of where she might have went It’s dark in her wake Destruction and oblivion […]

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1 minute

. . The anger I feel boils just beneath the surface I’m suffocating on the rage I see a red landscape covered in disgust I look back at the dred smothered in disdain I look forward to repulsion caked in jealousy Murderous impulse held down with strings of regret Hatred of all things light All […]

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Nightmare

I have this dream, a nightmare really and I have had it the better part of 20 years. It always starts the same and ends exactly the same way it’s what happens in the middle that dependent on what’s happening in my life that changes. It’s dark and violent. Bloody and Horrific. No matter how […]

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At Dusk

As darkness settles, the clouds roll in Seemingly touching the ground There is a calm stillness, a hush over city As if we know the end is nearing We are watching in wait for judgment Something is different this time, Something not quite right, As if damnation is further off then we thought Some kneel […]

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Remarkable Grace

I have a friend who has this quiet courage. She’s not boastful or conceded, she doesn’t pretend to have answers to her questions or act like she has it together. She’s real, raw, vulnerable and is learning to navigate through her life. She stumbles and loses her way, finds herself and pushes through. My friend […]

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Don’t make me

I just can’t No The words are simple, the meaning pure I don’t have it in me No matter how much I try Its asking to much I can’t be bothered Just don’t care I can’t Please don’t make me . . . I don’t want to Not even a little bit Not at all […]

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Here

Can they see through me? See me for the fraud I am. The liar I have become. These feelings I have resurface from time to time. The static and darkness creeps in trying to snuff of my light. It’s not a call for people to give words of encouragement. Or fill me with compliments ensuring […]

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Doubt

No matter how far I come Self doubt gets me down Not being good enough No matter how hard I try It’s too hard It gets the best of me Why even bother Save myself on disappointment Give up on it Before it gives up on me Why am I not good enough? As I […]

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6

. . . Deflated, Disheartened Overcome with exhaustion Distracted, Dejected Consumed with sadness . . . Depression . .

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