Looking Back

As my birthday approaches I find myself looking back and remembering my life.  Becoming nostalgic of years past.  Memories that seem to grow more hazy as the years add up.

Birthdays are so different as a kid.  The lead up, the excitement the anticipation of the big party you’ve been planning for months.  Then as you age the monumental birthdays have meaning 18,21,30,40,50 etc. Each decade passing giving you pause, a time to reflect on your life.

Well I am not reaching a milestone but I have been looking back and thinking.  I have lived so much and conquered so little in a world so vast.  That is not to say I have done nothing.  I have been through many things in my years and  I know I am going to go through more, its life. From looking back there are a few birthdays that stand out. My 13th birthday I got a “surprise party” at Pizza Hut.  My 18th, showing my id with my parents after drinking in those bars for years, to end up with friends at strippers (they did have a foundation you know), My 24th birthday, spent in the hospital, 30th the first time my extended family had been with me for a birthday or seen me since I was 16. My 32nd… Vegas Baby… all great memories all or different reasons (yes even the hospital year).

Looking ahead at the years to come I wonder what will come my way.  New adventures I will have, obstacles I will overcome.   I know what I am looking for, the list is short but all-encompassing and I am starting on it now; I want the upcoming years to be filled with love, happiness and success (cliché I know but it is true).  I want not only to be surrounded by love but I want to inspire it, I want not only personal happiness but I want to bring joy to others, and I don’t just want personal success I want those around me to find success and personal fulfilment in ways they didn’t even know they wanted.  In the years to come I want to be better.  I have worked hard and persevered to become this person, and while I am proud by many of my accomplishments; I want more.  More of all the good; but because I know how life likes to operate, I will take the bad to make the good, great…. Heres to the next year.  Bring it on.

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